There Were Never Strawberries
by lu112
Summary: Jisbon fluffiness. Im awful with summaries! Jane hijacks Lisbon for a day out. please review :- *LAST CHAPTER is now up! xxxx
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hey guys! This is my first story so it's probably not going to set the world on fire but please review! It's based on the poem inspired by the poem "Strawberries" by Edwin Morgan which we studied in English class today and I instantly thought of Jane and Lisbon. Every chapter is going to start with a few lines of the poem. Thanks guys... xxx**

_There were never strawberries_

_Like the ones we had _

_That sultry afternoon_

The summer heat had permeated the walls of the CBI building. Teresa at her desk, unable to concentrate on the screen in front of her, the sun beating through the window on to the back of her neck. Cases were always slow during heat waves for some reason, it was like the bad guys wanted to enjoy the California summer before being sent to prison, she thought .Despite all loving their jobs , she knew her team would much rather be anywhere else but inside the office with nothing to do.

"Okay guys seeing as we don't have a case you can all go home if you want...assuming you're all up to date with your reports, there's really no reason for us all to be stuck here. So go enjoy the sun and I'll let you know if we get a case, ok?"

A wave of delight passed over the less than crowded bullpen.

"Thanks boss!" exclaimed Van Pelt. She got up to leave with Wayne Rigsby following behind her. Tossing a smile at Lisbon as they left. Cho set his book down on his desk and said goodbye to Lisbon before grabbing his keys and leaving. She saw no reason to wake Jane. He was asleep on his beloved couch so he would not cause her any trouble as she (tried) to finish the work which she was finding mind numbingly dull today. She went back to her office and shut the door.

Fifteen minutes later Jane poked his head around the door.

" Hey Lisbon, why you still here? I thought you let everyone go home?"

She responded without even looking up.

"Someone's gotta be here if we get a case"

"I'm here..."

"You can go home too. I won't need your psychic abilities to finish my paper work"

She looked up at him with a smirk before looking back towards the screen. To her surprise he turned and left. She wasn't sure why, but she felt slightly disappointed. She shook her head to re-focus on the task instead of the fact that she wished she still had Jane here with her. She'd been feeling like that more and more recently and she didn't like it. Whenever she wasn't with him, she found herself wishing she was. Like something dropping at great speed from her head into her stomach, she recognised how she felt ( a kind of longing she guessed) but she always did her best to ignore it.

She was shaken from these thoughts when Jane set a box of strawberries in front of her and sat in the chair facing her.

"so..." He said picking one from the box and biting into it " let's do something. I mean, you can finish this later right?"

Still slightly unsure of herself she looked at him and then down to her desk where the red berries sat shining with moisture. She picked one up and bit it. It was cool on her tongue , in contrast to the heat in her office and the redness rising in her cheeks.

He was still waiting for his answer as she sat back into her chair. Her response shocked him.

"Like what?"

He'd expected her to tell him to stop distracting her or to berate him for causing all the work in the first place.

"Like whatever you want my dear Lisbon....What do you wanna do?"

She didn't really know what she wanted to do or what she wanted from him in general.

"Umm...I don't know. But I am getting a little jealous that the others are off enjoying themselves and I'm stuck here." She said as she looked around her office.

" Well thanks Lisbon, I didn't know i was such bad company.."

"That's not what I meant"

"So your saying you enjoy my company?"

His trade mark grin caused her to flush way more than the sun beating through the glass.

"Whatever." She half smiled as she looked back down to her paperwork.

"Well as that's as close to an admission that I am going to get I'll take it. Come on" He ordered as he yanked her from her chair.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hi everyone (or anyone who is reading****!) Here is chapter 2. Pretty please review (even if it's bad!) Probably going to be about 7 chapters. Xxx **

_Sitting on the step_

_Of the open French window_

_Facing each other_

_Your knees held in mine_

_The blue plates in our laps_

_The strawberries glistening_

_In the hot sunlight _

_We dipped them in sugar_

_Looking at each other_

_Not hurrying the feast for one to come_

Lisbon grabbed the box on her desk as she was dragged from her office. She had forgotten Jane was holding her hand until he let it go when they reached the elevator.

"Where are we going?" she asked in a bid to take her mind off her tingling skin.

"Patience woman! Don't worry, you'll like it"

After the obligatory power struggle for the right to drive (he had convinced her on the principle that she did not know where they were going) they pulled out of the CBI car park. With the windows down and the warm breeze carrying the sound of the radio, which was loudly playing a selection of her favourite summer songs, she allowed herself to relax.

Her mind drifted to the man sitting next to her and to what it would be like to wake up every morning and be dragged out of bed spontaneously to go on an adventure with him....She stopped herself. Those were dangerous thoughts.

Jane would never be hers, he belonged to a ghost.

But somewhere over the last few months he had changed gradually. So slowly she barely noticed it until now. He'd become less vocal in his need for revenge, sure it still raised its head from time to time but a lot of the venom formerly to be heard in his words had melted away.

"It's all in your head Teresa." She scolded herself mentally "It's like his heart is surround by a scar tissue of hate. It's what keeps him near you but it's going to be what takes him away in the end. You know that."

She glanced over quickly at him to find him tapping the steering wheel in time with the music. To look at him now you'd never guess that this man had murder in mind. He didn't look like a killer. When he glanced back at her, his eyes full of warmth, his face lit up by _that_ smile, those thoughts faded from her mind. She looked out the window of the car to avoid his gaze. The car was silent.

Somewhere between "I'm yours" and "Hey, Soul Sister" the car slowed and stopped.

"Well we couldn't just have gone to the park across the street from the CBI, now could we?" he asked when he saw the puzzled look on her face. A face he looked forward to seeing more and more every morning.

"And why not?" not that she minded but she felt she should ask

"What's special about that?" he asked as he undid his seatbelt and smiled at her.

Lisbon was blown away by the place when they got out of the car. It was beautiful and unlike the park near the CBI, she had never investigated a murder there .That had really taken the shine off the place across the street from the office.

Jane walked on as if he knew the exact spot they were going to. Which Jane being Jane, he did. Lisbon almost gasped when she saw it. It was like something out of a movie. A beautiful carved white pagoda stood in the shade of a large tree, right beside a stream.

"I told you that you'd like it" Jane bent and half whispered in her ear. She looked up and smiled at him. He was right, she loved the place.

Jane sat on the step of the pagoda and took off his jacket. Lisbon sat beside him and looked out at the water. It was nice to be here with him, away from murders and case reports.

"Strawberry?" he offered

She accepted and they began to talk. Not about work, but about anything. Grace and Rigsby, Cho's new girlfriend, why Jane will never get rid of his little blue Citroen and even Bosco. Lisbon hadn't talked about him since he was killed. She did her best to hold back the tears, but it didn't work.

"I'm sorry Jane" she dried her eyes

"What for? You've seen me cry. It's not very manly but it's the truth"

"That's different. They were your family. Bosco and I weren't family or anything...but when I think about him, I just feel so guilty."

"Because you slept with him?"

"No. Because I know he loved me. He gave me his heart and I didn't take care of it. I never loved him back and I hate that I caused him that much pain. It's horrible loving someone and them not loving you back. It's the worst feeling in the world and I just wished I could have loved him."

She was no longer talking about Bosco's pain. But her own

"I know... It's not your fault you didn't love him. You can't feel guilty about that. Believe me; you just can't help who you fall in love with. If we could where would the fun be, huh?"

He wrapped his arm around her and squeezed.

He was no longer talking about Bosco's love for her. But his own.

She looked up at him.

"Thanks"

She looked away again and was taken aback when she felt him kiss her hair.

"Anytime"

They stayed like that for a while, neither of them in any rush to move. They just sat and talked and ate strawberries.

Laughing every now and then quite loudly, Lisbon moving away to playfully smack him on the arm then settling back under his arm again, leaning slightly towards him as he spoke. The other people in the park looked at them, seeing a couple very much in love.

A young girl sighed and hoped some day she would find a guy who loved her like that.

An elderly couple sitting on a bench across the path smiled and remember when they had been young and in love like them.

Lisbon was unaware of the gazes they were receiving but Jane had noticed, as he always did. He fell silent and pulled away slightly from her. He tilted her head upwards so he was looking into her green eyes. Her smiled faded and only a trace of it could be seen across her lips. It was clear to him she didn't understand yet.

"Teresa..."

"Yes..."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hi guys! Thanks to everyone who put the story on alert or added it to favourites and to xxxBekaForEvaxx and Chiisana Minako for reviewing! Here is chapter 3. Chapter 4 will be up later on this evening. Keep reviewing! Please...... :-) xxx**

_The empty plates_

_Laid on the stone together_

_With the two forks crossed_

_And I bent towards you_

_Sweet in that air_

_In my arms_

_Abandoned like a child_

His face was serious now. She hoped he hadn't guessed her feelings but knowing him, it was all too possible that he had. Now he was going to tell that, although he had grown fond of her, he did not love her and that he would never see her as more than a friend. That's what he had meant when they had been talking about Bosco. When he had told her that she shouldn't feel guilty for not returning his love, he had been talking about (or maybe even to) himself. That's what he had meant.

"Oh God." She looked away before she spoke so as he wouldn't see her eyes. They always gave her away. He'd see her heart breaking when he told her the truth , he'd see them fill with tears , he'd see the tiny shred of hope he had given her today vanish and he'd see her putting back on her mask as she tried to defend her pride.

He'd see her lying when she said that she understood or when she denied her feelings ever existed.

Her heart was pounding. She was sure he could feel it.

"What is it, Patrick?"

She braced herself for the moment of impact, when all those fears became a reality. He didn't say any of those things.

"Thank you, for today. For everyday really..."

She turned back to face him with questions in the eyes she had previously feared would give the game away.

He bent his head slightly towards her and kissed her on the side of her mouth. Half his lips on hers, the other half on her lower cheek. A perfect symbol of their relationship and what it had become. Beyond, and more intimate, than friends but still short of lovers. It was a kind of limbo kiss to fit their kind of limbo feelings.

He wrapped a second arm around her and pulled her to his chest. She was the only thing in the world that made him feel less than certain. The kiss had only been a peck. That was all he could find the courage for. He was afraid. A woman like Lisbon would never let herself fall for a man like him. In his mind, he was broken and damaged, when she needed a hero. He would never be a hero. He didn't deserve a second chance at this, and she deserved the world.

Her head lay on his chest. This was the sort of position she had only ever hoped to be in. She was unsure of what it meant. The kiss, this embrace, the whole day. One thing she knew was that just this once would never be enough. She was an all-or-nothing type of person and she would rather never have gotten this close to Jane if it was never going to happen again. Granted, the kiss had been innocent, chaste even, but if she had to get up and go to work every morning, knowing what this felt like and not being able have it again, it would be too much for her.

"Thank you for everyday too..."

He looked down at the woman resting on his chest. The fading sun illuminating her face.

"Thanks for all the paper work and lawsuits?" he was trying to lighten the mood. He would not allow himself to hope for this. He never thought he would love anyone or anything again, but he found himself loving her and every single moment they spent together, especially this one. He never thought anyone could fix him, and not even Teresa ever fully would, but she was coming close.

Before she answered, he closed his eyes and promised his wife and child that he would never forget them. Never stop loving them or stop wanting justice for them. That's what he wanted now, justice, not vengeance. They had loved him and they wouldn't have wanted him to become the bitter man he had done over the past four years. He didn't believe in Heaven or an afterlife but he knew they would have wanted their husband and father to be happy. They would have wanted him to choose life.

He remembered what Lisbon had said to him the night he shot Hardy

"...I think you'd choose life."

It suddenly dawned on him.

"Patrick....."

"Yes....."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: As promised here is chapter 4. It's a bit short but I kinda like it, but that's probably because I wrote it in geography class today. Jane and Lisbon are a lot more entertaining than the rock cycle let me tell you....I'm holding chapter 5 ransom for reviews! **** Xxxx**

_From your eager mouth _

_The taste of strawberries_

_In my memory_

_Lean back again_

_Let me love you_

She opened her mouth to speak and drew in a breath. He could see her hesitating. He wasn't giving her the chance to change her mind now. Not now they were this close to something they had both been waiting for.

He looked into her eyes. Just as she feared, he could read her through them. The shining emeralds readily providing enough information for him to read her thoughts.

He could see she was scared, nervous and unsure but he could see, above everything else, that she loved him. Eyes tracing her face, he moved towards her.

She knew he was surveying her. For once, she could tell how he felt.

_His _eyes gave _him _away too. She could see he felt guilty for moving on, that he was scared. Scared to lose her and scared to hurt her, but she could see above everything else, that he loved her. Eyes tracing his face, she moved towards him.

Their eyes fluttered shut when their lips met. Softly at first. She could feel his warm breath envelope her face. He could smell her hair, sweet and like cinnamon.

They tasted strawberries.

Her hand rested gently on the side of his face. Their lips parting slowly, trying to take in as much of each other as possible. His arms still loosely wrapped around her. A soft noise of approval slipped from Lisbon's throat. Something between a moan and a sigh.

Jane tightened his grip around her in response and deepened the kiss.

Her head was beginning to feel light. Both of her arms found their way around his neck. Pulling herself up ever so slightly, her body dangerously close to his. Jane swung her over onto his lap. The tone of the kiss had changed from sweet to passionate; verging on urgent.

The tempo slowed, and they sat there, in the evening's golden sunlight. Wrapped in each other's arms, still kissing each other.

They stopped for a moment but barely moved. They were still so close that when she spoke, their lips still brushed.

"About time." She whispered breathlessly, smiling with her forehead resting on his.

"I have to agree my dear..." He placed a feather light kiss on her lips. His smile was even bigger than usual.

"But what about tomorrow? What do we do then?" She whispered the question without moving from her current position. She wanted to feel loved like this for just a minute longer

He pulled his head back a little and looked her in the eyes. His face full of sincerity.

"Well I hope it involves more of this."

He kissed her again.

"Patrick, how does this work? Tonight was amazing. How can we keep it this way? When we go back to work, when people find out...It will never be like this again"

Her eyes were shining with tears. He knew what she meant.

She was talking about Red John. How could they stay this happy when he reared his head again? Or when Patrick came face to face with him?

"Teresa, I love you. Do you love me?"


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Oh my god THANK YOU all sooo much! The reviews have been amazing and so many of you have added alerts it's unbelievable! Ok...calming down now****

**Anyways...here is chapter 5. Chapter 6 will be up tomorrow, I'm not 100% sure if it will be the last one or if I'll go to 7. There is only a line of the poem left for 6 so chapter 7 (if it happens, which I think it probably will, but I'll have to see how chapter 6 turns out) will be reusing a quote. Oh well that's my rambling over for today. **

**Love (and reviews****) as always – Louise Xxxx.**

_Let the sun beat_

_On our forgetfulness_

_One hour of all_

_The heat intense_

_And summer lightening _

_On Kilpatrick hills_

"You know I do." She sounded bashful.

Jane couldn't help but smile, only the mighty agent Lisbon could feel embarrassed by telling the man who loved her, that she loved him back. A public make out session was fair game, but love was another story.

She saw him smiling at her. It was one of his rare, honest, genuine smiles. Her worried expression was broken by a matching grin, as if she had only just realised what he had said (and what she had said back).

"I love you, Patrick." She sounded as though she were testing it out. Like saying it out loud for the first time was a relief.

"Thank God! Now we don't have to worry about it being awkward at work tomorrow. I mean, if you had said no, and that you only wanted me for my body....we could have had a problem."

She threw him her best "don't-mess-with-me" look and swatted his forearm.

"You wish, buddy"

"Well I wouldn't object" he grinned.

They were both glad to see that this new development had not changed the dynamic of their relationship. They would have hated to not be sparring partners anymore. He'd still start an argument, she'd take the bait, he'd pass a comment and she'd blush. That was how it worked.

Their light hearted, playful conversation continued for a while. They had almost forgotten the underlying serious topic that needed discussing. The twilight air was still warm. The sky almost dark, a beautiful shade of indigo. The first stars were out in the sky and there they sat, bickering by the stream.

Lisbon cracked first. She began to laugh. Tonight he was proving too irresistible to fight with, not that she would ever admit that to him (and no way was he going to start getting off easier at work either!)

She kissed him again. This time, as he was mid-sentence. Her mind had drifted a thousand miles away from Red John and any other reservations she'd had. She loved that about him, he always made it better. Whether he felt worthy of the title or not, he was the hero she had been waiting for.

He felt her body relax in his arms. He knew now was the time to say it. Now she was calmer, he could bring it up.

"You know it's never going to be over. Not until we catch him. Even then, I'll still be...You know I'm always going to be a little bit damaged, Teresa, right?"

Through the darkness, he could see a tear streak down her cheek. He bushed it away with his thumb.

"You said _we"_ she pointed out.

He smiled again at his Lisbon (calling her his girlfriend didn't really fit them. It seemed too trivial. HisLisbon was much better. _His_.)

"Teresa, I loved my wife and daughter. I hate what he did to them and I hate him. But I don't hate him more than I love you.

You've made me realise over the past few months, that me, sitting on my ass in a jail cell won't bring them back. It won't change what happened, and it's giving him what he wants.

He doesn't want me dead; he wants me tormented. And right now, I can't think of a single thing worse than going to jail and leaving you behind. Knowing that I'd lost you and caused you so much pain would be the most horrific thing to deal with. I don't want that, and I never thought I'd be saying this over the past four years but, I want to live.

Before it didn't matter to me if I died trying to catch him but now it does. You've given me a reason. I will do everything in my power to make sure that I'm always by your side, ok? Red John can't touch us. Not if we don't let him. "

Teresa replayed as much of what he had said as she could in her head. She was speechless. She never knew how much it was possible to love another person, until now. She felt so relieved, that she wasn't going to lose Jane to a serial killer, or to the justice system that she'd dedicated her life to. She really didn't know how to respond. She just opened her mouth and let what she felt come out.

"I won't let him, Jane, I swear to you. I'll do whatever it takes. We'll catch him, together, and then he can see how happy we are. That's gonna be worse than death for him, because he's going to know that he has lost. That's how we can get back at him; we can hurt him every day by being happy together. Patrick, I promise I'll do my best to always make us happy."

Jane felt a lump in his throat. He hadn't felt this much part of something since he held his daughter for the first time. They were a unit, he and Lisbon, against the world. Seemingly unbreakable, yet delicate at the same time.

"Lisbon, I can't promise I won't ever piss you off, but I promise that I'll never hurt you intentionally, I'll never leave you and I'll always protect you...even though you're the one with all the guns."

She laughed. They kissed again, this time as if to seal the promises they had just made to one another.

Without the worry and fear, they kissed more freely. At last they were, for now, just two carefree lovers under a blanket of stars. Their kisses grew longer and their breathing deeper.

The sky flashed with a bolt of summer lightning and thunder rolled over head.

"Come on." Lisbon, still on his lap, said, looking down into his smiling face. His eyes blazing with mischief.

"Let's get out of here..."

The heat between their two bodies was intense by now.

"Let's go home, Jane..."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey guys! So this is going to be the last chapter ****. I'm actually going to miss writing this story. It was so much fun! Anyway thanks again for all the feedback. I've some stuff in mind for my next one....not sure yet if I'll base it on "Your Love Is My Drug" by Ke$ha or "The Only Exception" by Paramore. Would love to hear what you think. Got ideas for both but they're all jumbled up in my head. **

**Anyway, thanks for reading! Had serious problems writing this chapter. **

**One more time with feeling for the reviews **

**Louise. Xxxx **

_Let the storm wash the plates._

The sun shone brightly through the gaps in her blinds. Teresa blinked in the early morning light. Her bare shoulder warmed by the golden rays flooding the room. She rolled over in her bed, and settled back down beneath the covers.

"Morning, Dear"

"Morning, Patrick"

It felt so natural, waking up beside him. She wrapped her arm around him and rested her head on his chest, as he kissed the top of her head.

"You so won't be able to stay mad at me at work on Monday now..."

"Somehow, I think I'll manage actually" She feigned an indignant tone

"What? So I don't get any special treatment?"

"Weekends and week days after 6 only...unless we have a case."

"What about snow days?"

"We're in California!"

"Sunshine- days?"

"Fine. Sunshine -days too."

"I guess I can handle that."

Patrick got up and went downstairs to start breakfast. Teresa lay in bed alone. She could still feel the warmth from where he had been lying. She pulled on his shirt and went downstairs. She could smell bacon and she could hear him humming. She stopped at the bottom of the stairs and took it all in. Last night had been amazing. Not just the physical part of it, but just laying in his arms, listening to him making future plans for them, like places they would go and things they would do.

If there ever had been any doubt in her mind as to how he felt about her, she knew now.

Jane pottered around in the kitchen. He hadn't felt like this in years. When he thought about it, he'd never felt like this.

"So I'm guessing you will want to keep this quiet from the team?"

"Just for now. After everything with Van Pelt and Rigsby, I don't want to rub their noses in it."

"Okay. It'll stay between us"

Jane's chest was bare, and Lisbon noticed that it wasn't the only naked area of his body. His wedding ring was gone. His finger no longer baring the gold band she had grown accustomed to. She didn't mention it and neither did he. It was enough as it was.

They spent the rest of the weekend as any normal couple would have; in bed, taking walks, watching TV. Fairly mundane stuff, but to them it was perfect. It was new to both of them.

Monday came all too soon. Jane left an hour before work so as he could go home and change. When Lisbon got to the office, the team were already there.

"Morning, Boss"

"Morning, Guys"

"How was your weekend?"

She almost laughed out loud.

"Oh, you know, the usual stuff"

She felt as though she was going to burst.

Jane came in half an hour later. Lisbon was already ensconced in her office, arguing with the D.A. on the phone. He went as usual, to the second love of his life, his couch.

Lisbon came out of her office almost immediately to tell the team about their new case; some sort of grizzly homicide in San Francisco. She looked across and saw Jane. She quickly looked away. She began to tell the other agents about the case, but she could tell Jane was still watching her. She tried her best to stay serious, but a smile found its way onto her lips. Lisbon felt herself blush slightly. She was like a school girl with a crush!

The team wondered what she could possibly be smiling about while imparting the details of a murder. They looked quizzically at each other. Van Pelt looked over at Jane. He was sitting up on his beaten, brown leather couch, grinning like an idiot too. Unlike Lisbon, however, he was not even bothering to try and conceal it.

She looked back to Lisbon, then at Jane again and back to Lisbon once more.

"About time!" Her face broke into a smile wider than even Jane's. She was genuinely happy for her friends. Whether they denied it or not, there was no mistaking what was going on.

Lisbon knew she should ask Van Pelt what she was talking about but there was really no point.

"That's what I said."

She left the office calmly and headed towards the elevator. Jane jumped off the couch and followed closely behind her, smiling back at their friends over his shoulder, throwing Van Pelt a wink.


End file.
